My husband asked me the other day if anyone from TSCC had contacted me about the house fire. I told him no, but then again, I haven't been in contact with anyone to tell them. He then told me that he'd called our bishop.
Hmmm. Fat lot of good that did, eh?
Okay. Here's the thing. If I were, say, someone's visiting teacher, and I learned that she had requested no contact with the church, I would respect that. If, however, I learned that the person's house had burned down, I would be calling or visiting not as a representative of the church, but as a fellow human. What can I do? How can I help?
And then today I've been thinking some more. I am actually "friends" on Facebook with a few members from our ward. And of all the people who responded with commiseration or well wishes, none of them were those people. I may be doing some unfriending tonight.
It goes back to what I said before about my loving visiting teacher who showed me only too clearly that she didn't love me at all. I was just a duty for her. And while I requested no contact from the church, I very clearly emphasized that it was me, and I did not speak for my husband in any way. For him to reach out, and be rebuffed, just pisses me off even more.
(Please note that I have friends who just happen to be members of the church, and this isn't directed at them in any way, shape, form, or fashion. I am referring specifically to the members of the ward in which we reside and which my husband would love someone to reach out to him not as someone who's falling away but in genuine compassion and kindness. (Did you just laugh there? Did you snort? Oh--the snort must have been from me. Sorry 'bout that, she says unrepentantly.)
Hmmm. Fat lot of good that did, eh?
Okay. Here's the thing. If I were, say, someone's visiting teacher, and I learned that she had requested no contact with the church, I would respect that. If, however, I learned that the person's house had burned down, I would be calling or visiting not as a representative of the church, but as a fellow human. What can I do? How can I help?
And then today I've been thinking some more. I am actually "friends" on Facebook with a few members from our ward. And of all the people who responded with commiseration or well wishes, none of them were those people. I may be doing some unfriending tonight.
It goes back to what I said before about my loving visiting teacher who showed me only too clearly that she didn't love me at all. I was just a duty for her. And while I requested no contact from the church, I very clearly emphasized that it was me, and I did not speak for my husband in any way. For him to reach out, and be rebuffed, just pisses me off even more.
(Please note that I have friends who just happen to be members of the church, and this isn't directed at them in any way, shape, form, or fashion. I am referring specifically to the members of the ward in which we reside and which my husband would love someone to reach out to him not as someone who's falling away but in genuine compassion and kindness. (Did you just laugh there? Did you snort? Oh--the snort must have been from me. Sorry 'bout that, she says unrepentantly.)
I will! Me and my husband would LOVE to! Well, as long as you don't mind that we're lds. I am so terribly sorry for the imperfections of the church. I myself have been "rebuffed" and, well, quite frankly...treated down right rudely before, and although there is no excuse for that to happen, I know it does. I apologize in behalf of them all. I apologize because I know I'm not perfect and have probably offended others as well =/ The gospel teaches us to love and accept everyone, and I don't know what's happened in your life to lead you to this point but from one human being to another, I know God is aware of you and your husband and your situation. And from one human being to another, I'm sorry for your trials. If you or your husband needs a friend, or someone to write and talk to, we just moved from Utah to California but we're searching for friends as well =) Not out of sympathy, not out of obligation, or as a "project"...
ReplyDeleteBut because you said you had a dog, and I love dogs =) I really hope you take me up on my offer. And good luck with everything!!
write me at: glennabartlett@gmail.com